Let Go
by blackNwhiteRoads
Summary: A girl with a broken life, a boy with a broken dream. When two lost people find each other, will they let go of all the pain life has given them? A Dwayne/OC Rated T for swearing words.
1. Chapter 1

I remember when my life was normal. It wasn't like this. At all. I used to have no worries. I used to be a happy, careless person, roaming around with no worries. I used to.

You'd probably ask yourself who am I, and why I'm saying those stuff.

_**Who am I?**_

I'm Josephine Silver Raymond. Better known as Jo, Silver, Josey, or Ray but preferably Jo. I was born on the 22nd of October, 1998. If you can't do the math, that means I'm going to turn 14 this year.

_**What do I look like?**_

I have blue eyes and blonde hair, which I'm _dying _to dye dark brown or black, that goes to the end of my back. My skin is pale with fading freckles on my nose and cheeks. I guess I was on the pretty side of normal-looking. I'm 5.5 ft. tall, and yes, I'm taller than most people around my age, but I like it that way. I actually want to grow even taller.

_**Why was I being all depressed in the beginning?**_

That's a pretty long story. But I have time, since I have nothing else to do, so being the nice person I am, I'm going to tell you all about me.

I have a small family. My mom, Jean, my dad, Tyler, and my older sister, Monique. If you see an overly cheerful, perfect family with an out-of-place girl, there's a 99% chance that's us. Even though my sister is only two years older than me, we're not close. I personally think that's she's an evil bitch hiding underneath all that fake-looking innocence that everyone believes that she is. Don't get me wrong I'm not jealous of her or anything, but I'm so sick of being neglected because her _majesty _is perfect in almost everything. I'm the underdog of the family, the under-achiever amongst the over-achievers. The loser amongst the winners. Do you know what I means? Sometimes I think I was a mistake that my parents had to live with. I mean, my 'perfect' sister is topping me in everything. Looks, brains, talents, friends, popularity, etc. Some days I'll think to myself 'Would it be better if I just drop dead? Would anyone even care?', but of course no one knows that because I never tell them. My mom would probably act like everything's okay and change the subject by saying something completely irrelevant like 'Did you hear what happened at work today?' or 'Did your sister tell you about the first place she got in the contest?'. Most of the time, I'd be fighting with Monique and I tell my parents that she crossed the line and they'd totally ignore me. Not even kidding. They wouldn't even glance at me. But if Monique tells them that I did something to her, which never happens since I avoid her, they'd drop everything in their hands and yell at me. That's how much my family cares.

People always have this idea that our whole family, excluding me, is perfect. A man and woman in 'love' and their beautiful daughter who's on everyone's good side. Then comes me. The 'emo', quiet girl in black with a skateboard in her hand. Let's just say they choose to avoid me.

**I have no problem with it.**

**I prefer it that way.**

But as soon as we step inside our house, the 'perfect family' act drops. My mom and dad start fighting over the silliest things, and my sister starts picking on me, and all of them change as if we went to a parallel universe. I'm the only one who stays the same.

**I didn't really care about all of that**

**I was happy and content with everything the way they were.**

I guess you want to know why I'm being the way I am.

If everything I just told you wasn't enough, don't worry.

**I still have more to my story.**

Last year everything changed. To the worse. My parents got a divorce, I don't know if I'm a bad person by saying that a part of me is happy because of it. My parents agreed that me and my sister should be with my dad, since my dad is more 'stable' and my mom 'needs a break' from everything that's happened. So my dad decided to move back to his hometown, Albuquerque. I would say that I was sad because I left my friends that I knew since I was a child, but to be honest, **I have none**.

**Well, I had.**

**But he's gone.**

So now I bet you're going to ask me 'What are you talking about?'.

_**Who was my friend, and where did he go?**_

I had one friend, who was also my best friend, and he died around the time I turned 13. So it's not too long ago, it happened last year.

**His name was John.**

I met him when I was in first grade, and since then we never stayed away from each other. He was the best person you could ever know. He was almost a year older than me, 11 months to be exact. He knew everything about me, just as I knew everything about him. I knew he was an only child, his dad died of cancer when he was 7, his mom raised him to be a perfect gentleman, he was a skateboarder like me, he had a blue eye and the other was green, his skin was similar to mine, pale but without freckles. his hair was light auburn and shaggy, always falling into his eyes. I remember how he had this weird habit of messing up his hair and playing with it whenever he was bored, nervous, shy, or concentrating. He was loved by everyone that saw him, he had this gravity to him that pulls people to him. His voice made you feel comfortable and safe, it was calm and had a usual small crack in his voice. He was a younger version of his dad.

**Too bad he even got his dad's cancer.**

He fought cancer twice before, always beating it and going back to his normal life. His hair would fall and he would shave it, becoming bald with no hair on his head or face, even his eyelashes and eyebrows fell out. But he always had a smile on his face that said everything's going to be okay.

**Too bad it wasn't.**

On his third time fighting cancer, the doctors said his body stopped reacting to the chemotherapy and the best thing to do was take him home and carry on with life, making him happy and content in his last months.

**Then he died.**

**And a part of me died as well.**

It was a turning point in my life. I became depressed and ever since then I shut everyone out of my life.

I guess everyone gave up on me. They didn't think I'd ever be happy again.

**Maybe they're right.**

He was the only reason I carried on. I still wear the dog tag that he gave me.

* * *

"_I have something for you." John said as he walked next to me on the sidewalk. We just finished the last day of school before our winter holiday and we were going to have a movie marathon in his house. I looked at him with curious eyes._

"_What is it?" I asked him excitedly, almost jumping in place. He knew that I loved his presents. They were always just my type; simple and meaningful. He stopped walking and turned to me, making me stop as well. I looked at him, his eyes sparkling under the winter sunshine, his cheeks flushed from the cold, and his bald head hidden underneath his beanie. He dug his hand in his hoodie's pocket and pulled out a silver dog tag. He held my hand and opened it, then putted the dog tag in it. He smiled expectantly at me._

"_Do you like it?" He asked me. I looked at the dog tag closely, it had 'John&Jo' in black writings on the front, and 'together forever' on the back. I grinned at him and gave him a hug, making sure it was the tightest embrace I could manage to give him._

"_I love it. Thank you so much." I told him with a huge smile when we pulled away. I gave it him, knowing he'd understand that I wanted him to put it around my neck._

"_I'll never take it off." I told him when he finished putting it around my neck. He pulled out his own dog tag from underneath his shirt. It was black with the same things written on it, except that it was in silver._

"_I have mine too." He grinned at me. "That way people won't claim they're our best friends." I laughed and linked hands with him as we went on our way again._

* * *

The day he died was the last day I saw him. I spent the entire week in his house, helping out his mom with cleaning up the mess he did when he puked blood or had a nose bleed, and making sure he was happy in his last few days. We knew that we all felt the same way; we knew he was going to die that week, so we did everything we can to make him happy. I spent the entire week sleeping on the comfy chair in his room, almost never sleeping or eating, just watching him and acting strong for him and his mom's sake. He still had the same smile on his face, the one that said that everything's okay.

* * *

"_Jo, I know you know it. I'm going to die. It's my time to go." John told me with a small smile on his pale, weak-looking face. I shook my head furiously._

"_No, don't you dare say that. You're not going to die, John. I won't let you." I told him, squeezing his hand. Almost as if I'm convincing myself._

"_I just wanna make sure you know that I love you. You made me the happiest person I could ever be when I was still here." He then cracked a grin. "Don't forget about me when you make new friends."_

"_I don't need new ones, you're still here. Don't talk like you're going to be gone, John. You're gonna be fine, like you always are. You fought it before, and you can fight it again." I let a tear drop from my eye. John pressed a little harder on my hand, which was probably the hardest squeeze he can do right now._

"_Jo, you need to move on after I'm gone. I'm going to watch over you, and I don't want to see you suffering just because I'm not there." _

"_You __**will **__be here. We're going to be together forever." I said, referring to the dog tags that we never took off. John smiled weakly and pulled me in a hug._

"_We will be." He whispered. I hugged him tighter, but still being careful not to hurt him or bruise him, and let some of my tears fall. I felt small drops falling on my shoulder. He was crying. Suddenly I wished that he never cried, it made me feel like he's really dying, like it wasn't just another round of cancer that's going to go away like each time._

**Then he was gone.**

* * *

His mom gave me his dog tag at his funeral, saying how he told her that I should have it when he died. I wore it that day, and since then I never took it off. I never let go of him, and I don't think I can.

**I don't want to.**


	2. Chapter 2

I sit on my bed, looking around my new room. It wasn't big, but it was me. It had black walls, a single bed with black sheets, some posters on the wall, a mirror, a wardrobe, and some other small stuff here and there. I've already unpacked all of my stuff, which weren't much, and I was listening to music right now. It was sunny outside, obviously because it's summertime. Our new house wasn't huge, but it wasn't too small either. It had three bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and a basement. I wasn't going to talk with my dad and sister so I didn't see the point of going out of my room.

I look at the small box that's been hiding in the corner of the room.

**I avoid it.**

And after another 2 hours, I look at it again.

**I can't avoid it forever.**

I walk towards it with a pounding heart and teary eyes.

I pick it up with shaking hands and put it on my bed.

**It's time.**

I slowly open it, taking enough time to calm myself down.

The first thing that I find in the box is John's picture.

**I cry for a while.**

But I hold myself back together and keep looking through the pictures in the box.

I reminisce about each and every picture I find.

By sunset, I was done with looking through the pictures and hanging them around my room.

**It's been hard, I'll admit it.**

**But it was worth it.**

I hear my name being called by my dad. I sigh, and wipe my face, making sure it doesn't look like I've been crying. When I see that there isn't anything that could give me away, I start making my way towards the dining room, which is connected to the living room and kitchen.

**The silence is deafening.**

**Not that I expected it not to be.**

My dad obviously tried to make it seem as if nothing's changed, but we all knew it was far away from it. My sister was annoying me as always, and my dad was eating and acting like there's nothing wrong at all. I try to finish eating as quickly as I can, leaving half of my plate untouched. I decided to take a walk around my new neighborhood so that's what I did. I notice that there's a park on the end of the street, so I walk in that direction. When I finally reach the park, I look around me to see if there is anyone my age.

**It wouldn't make a difference anyway.**

But when I sit on one of the swings, listening to my favorite song on my iPod, a girl who looks about 7 years old runs over to me.

"Hi! I never saw you before, you must be new! I'm Olive!" She says excitedly. A little too excitedly, but I honestly couldn't be annoyed, she was just a small kid. I give her a small, almost invisible smile, and shake her hand.

"Hey Olive. I'm Jo, and yes, I'm new here. I just moved into the neighborhood today." I told her in a friendly voice. Olive looks behind her and I look over too, a guy with black hair, must be dyed, and a notepad in his hand is walking our way.

"Dwayne, look who I just met! This is Jo, she just moved here today. Jo, this is my older brother, his name is Dwayne." Olive introduces us to each other. Dwayne nods at me politely then holds up his notepad for Olive to read. She nods after she's done reading and turns to me again.

"Well, we gotta go now. Bye Jo!" She waves her hand as she walks away with her brother.

"Bye."

* * *

The week passed by fairly slow, with the same routine everyday. I wake up, sit in my room all day until my dad calls me for dinner, I finish eating quickly, and go for a walk or skateboard around the neighborhood. But school was starting on Monday, which is 3 days from now, so I used this time to relax and prepare myself for it. This would be my second year in school without my best friend. I didn't set my hopes too high; I knew that I wouldn't make any friends. Good thing I didn't want any. I was sitting on my front porch with the scrapbook I made with John. The last few pictures were of him and I at his house, just days before he got too sick to even move from his bed. I was smiling at the pictures of the kid-version of me and him when Olive ran over to my house with a big smile on her face.

"Hey Jo! How are you!" She said in her usual happy voice. I smiled at her and closed my scrapbook.

"I'm good, Olive. How are you? Excited for school?" I started a small conversation with her.

"Yes, I am! But Dwayne isn't. He's too nervous because he might get in trouble." She continued when she saw the confused look on my face. "You see, he made this vow that he won't talk until he gets into the air force academy. Mom and dad didn't allow him to go. He's scared that his teachers would give him detention for not talking when they tell him to." Now the notepad made sense.

"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay." I said uncertainly.

**If only that was true…**

* * *

I leave my house on Monday after taking a pop tart from the kitchen. I still had 20 minutes to reach my new school, which wasn't that far, so I take my skateboard and start on my way.

**Surprise, surprise.**

Heads turn my way as soon as I enter the school. I thought that only happened in movies. Some people whisper and make jokes about me, mostly because I was wearing black from head to toe. Apparently that wasn't normal, because every girl was wearing colorful clothes with some kind of flowers or any other girly pattern on them.

**At least they'll leave me alone. **

After I reach my locker I put my bag in it and check my schedule to see what books I'll have to take. I took my three books and some notebooks and a pen then closed my locker and began my search for the classroom. Some jerks found it funny to drop my books.

"Watch it freshman." A guy sneered at me. I glared at him then picked up my books and went on my own way again.

"Aww, did we make the emo cry?" The guy's friend mocked me, making his friends all laugh.

**Just hold on and be strong.**

I sat on my desk in the back of the classroom, copying notes about the stuff the teacher was saying. The same guy who called me an emo leaned forward his desk and told me in a quiet voice "Looks like you and that Dwayne will be best friends." Then he sat back in his place when he saw that the teacher was looking at him. Did they also do the same thing for Dwayne?

* * *

I held my lunch tray and looked around for an empty table, I wasn't going to try and sit at a table with people on them, I already knew they'd either walk away from the table, or kicking me out from it. I didn't need any more humiliation. Fortunately, or unfortunately, I saw Dwayne sitting on an empty table, eating his lunch and reading a book, completely ignoring the people who were making fun of him.

**There goes nothing.**

I made my way to his table and sat down, half expectantly that he will make me leave the table. He looked at me blankly then returned to his book. I took that as a good sign and started eating my lunch in silence. Maybe I should start a vow of silence too. It was way more comfortable than having to act happy when people are talking to you.

"Hey guys, look! The freak and the emo are sitting together! It's a match made in heaven!" One of the guys from the jerk's group said in a loud voice, making sure that everyone in the cafeteria heard him. Dwayne simply ignored them and went on reading as if nothing happened, while I decided to give a death glare to whoever looked our way.

**This is gonna be fun.**


End file.
